The Rise and Fall of Dobby the Pump

A few of you are aware that in one of my brightest moments I managed to leave my insulin pump (fondly named Dobby) on during an x-ray last week.
Pump and x-rays do not go together, and sadly Dobby is now sent off to the land of faulty pumps. I've received my new pump (newly named Severus) and everything is going smoothly again, but I can't help but feel this new pump is different, something's not quite right.

I was on multiple daily injections (MDI) for 8 months until I made the decision to get an insulin pump. The pump was supposed to bring freedom from 4 injections a day, letting me eat what I want, wake up when I want, do whatever I felt like doing without being bound to a tight schedule. Ultimately, it did, but at first Dobby and I didn't get along so well.

I remember back in January 2011 when I was first hooked up to the pump. It felt weird, and like an enormous and confusing device. I was let loose in the hospital cafeteria for lunch and was half way through a meal when I realised I'd forgotten to have my insulin through the pump.
It had been 10 minutes and I'd already stuffed it up.

I was nervous about having a tube hanging on me, worried it would catch on everything and rip out the cannula I had just put in. A big deal, because the injection of the cannula was at the time more painful than my old needles.

But most of all I felt conscious of it being there. Type 1 diabetes is called an invisible illness, because you can't look at someone and say that they have it. Having a pump meant that my diabetes was front and centre, and trust me when I say everyone is curious about it! I've heard all sorts of ideas, some thinking it was a pager, a recorder or a clip on phone. I spent a while trying to hide it under clothing, using waist bands and thigh bands, even cutting a hole into my school dress pocket to keep it in there (bad idea, the hole expanded and the pump went bungee jumping.)

Don't get me wrong, I have absolutely no problem with it now. It's always in clear view, being taken out fairly often during the day.
I'm also happy to tell you all about it and how it works, so much so that you may want to stop the rambling at some point! I managed to get comfortable having my little contraption easily in view, and having a new one seems a little strange again- even though the only difference is the colour!

The buttons are clicky, the vibrate alarm is sharper and the beeps are higher pitched like a new pump should be.
But I can't help but miss my old little pump, with its stuck buttons, weak attempts at alerting and half hearted beeps. Having a new device makes it seem like I'm adjusting all over again, but at least this time I won't be sewing my clothes to accommodate!


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